All Things Monica

Yes, I’m neglecting my blog, but I can’t help it. I have been super busy with classes. I’m actually doing the work this time instead of procrastinating and squeaking by; that takes more time. Of course, that also means I should do better in my classes, and understand rather than just learning to pass a test.

I’m going for an interview tomorrow for a program that provides tutors that come to the student’s home. I’m really excited. I love t...

I’ve mentioned that due to neurofeedback and avoiding HFCS, I’ve been feeling really good. I haven’t felt down in a long time (weeks). Then yesterday came. I got in the car to go to my mother’s for another treatment, and WHAM! I felt worse than I have in months. I didn’t care if I drove off the road, I wanted to go home and go to sleep, and it hurt to move or think. Where on earth did it come from? I called Matthias and my mom, and was better while I was on phone...

I’ve started classes again! I’m glad to be in class again, but nervous about getting everything done. Of course, that’s true at the beginning of every quarter. However, I’ve decided to approach things a little differently. In the past, I’ve done the bare minimum in studying at the beginning of a course, then if I don’t do well on a test (and I’m usually fine), then I study harder afterward. Well, that’s not a good way to do things. This time, I&...

(My friends are rolling their eyes right now.)

The Gift of Fear is a book that I discovered a few years ago via Oprah. The author, Gavin de Becker, is phenomenal. He is an expert at predicting violent behavior. He talks about the fact that especially in Western society, we have pushed our instinct to the back. Instinct in animals (including humans) is driven by survival, so it stands to reason that it becomes important when you're in danger. We have this "gift of fear" to k...

This was originally written (by hand) on January 31, 2006:

I've had a sort of epiphany over the last few days. As a Christian, I've heard numerous times that Christ lives in me and that my body is God's temple. I've started thinking more deeply about the obvious and not-so-obvious implications of this concept. It requires a paradigm shift to what I'm calling "Temple Thought." I know that this idea is not a new one, but its all-encompassing effects and how I sho...

Anyone who knows me for long knows that I'm slightly obsessed with office supplies and stationary. As long as I can remember, my absolute favorite part of every school year was buying new school supplies: the smell of just-sharpened pencils (of course, I only use mechanical .5 mm pencils now), the smooth unused notebook paper, the sharp "snap" of a new art box lid - a wave of delight for the senses. Though I try to reuse items now, don't think my ecstasy has dulled since then. Every quarter, ...

My grandmother, whom we call Mawmaw, went to the hospital today with shortness of breath. She’s 83, and my mom said that when older people go to the hospital often, it’s a sign that their body is wearing down. She was crying as she told me this. Later, she sent me a text letting me know that Mawmaw was stable, but that she was talking about being tired and wanting to go to Heaven. Emotionally, I think I shut down as soon as my mom called about her going to the hospital. That’...

I still haven't had a coke, or even a craving for almost a week now, so that's awesome! I?m doing pretty well about staying away from sugar in general, HFCS and artificial in particular. I?m not sure how much of this is the new med or God, but either way I?m glad. I?m looking into getting better tennis shoes so I can walk more, too. I have VERY flat feet, so I can't just get any old shoe. I?m starting with inserts for arch supports, and that may be enough. I?ve also started wearing my pedomet...

This may not be news to many of you, but it was to me. Due to a recent health condition, I was looking for information online that might aid me along with the medicine from my doctor. All the information I found said I should avoid all artificial sweeteners, High Fructose Corn Syrup (HFCS), bread, refined flour/sugar, etc. Those are things I should already have been avoiding due to my insulin issues from PCOS. Now I have more incentive. I have gone about one week into avoiding ...

You heard me. Now I’m giving myself shots twice a day. The metformin is working, but not enough, so my endocrinologist (aka, Gift from God) decided to start me on Byetta. It helps your body to produce the right amount of insulin at the right time. Some people have issues with nausea temporarily and bruising at the injection site, but I started it yesterday, and have had no problems so far (knock on wood).

If you’re new to this blog, you may not know that three friends and I went to four Proclaimers concerts last year in 5 days. We had a blast with the twins and their band, including meeting them at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and hanging with them there for the afternoon. (Search the blog for more info) We were planning on going to two concerts this year as well, but my friends are now involved in a community theater production and they can’t really afford the time off work. So,...

I'm on day two of reading through the Bible in year: so far so good (lol). I'm using blueletterbible.org to keep track of what I'm reading. I really like their plans. They have several different ways to go through (traditional canon, chronological, NT/OT, etc.), so you have choices. I've chosen to go through chronologically. (I've read several places that the Bible as we know it is not in the order in which it was writt...

I've now had two treatments. (Don't worry, I won't tell you about every single one.) I could tell that I was more relaxed and focused. At least 2 people as me who gave me all the sugar, so I guess that means my energy was up, too. I'm hopeful that this bodes well for the future.

In semi-related news, my friend Marlene and I have decided to hold each other accountable to reading through the Bible in a year. I'm excited but nervous about it. I've always had a REALLY hard tim...

I’ve had my first neurofeedback treatment, and I can already tell a difference. That day, my muscles were less tense; I felt more at peace, etc. Yesterday and today, I’ve been accused of having too much sugar. I can only assume that that means I’m more energetic than usual. I can tell that I’m more focused and less anxious. If this is the result after one session, I have high hopes. I believe I’m supposed to do it twice a week for 22 weeks or something, so itR...

Some of you know that I’ve been contemplating how much I talk. It’s a LOT, to understate. A few months ago, I mentioned thinking that I should be more deliberate about what I say. I’ve been doing that more in the last 2 weeks than all those months before. As a consequence, I’ve been much less talkative than usual. This could also be a result of less anxiety (one of the “symptoms” is excess chatter). Because of this, everyone at works asks me if I’m al...

I have been dealing with chronic depression since at least the age of 11. I have been to several counselors and have taken various medications, both of which have helped a great deal. I always felt that this was my major issue and primary cross to bear. I have since realized (through God, mom, and my therapist) that my depression is just the result of having Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD).

People with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) go through t...

No, I'm not in grad school yet. I’m just in the process of applying (yes, still). I’ve finished the application for Kent State, but not yet for OSU. You might wonder why. Well, apparently OSU likes to make sure you’re broke and frustrated before you even turn in your application. They’ve started using this new system to apply online. Lucky us, huh? Well, the system is fine, but in addition to the application fee of $40 from OSU this system charges $100 to apply. WHAT?!...

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences.. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is...

this game is way fun. go to this site, and sign up even if you don't want to play, 'cause then i'll get some free items!

I am sick to death of what this society has done to us as women. Watch the video at the link.